Put 'em Up, Polly!

Put 'em up, Polly!
(08 November 2005)


Macaw blimey! A Berkshire burglar kidnapped a parrot during a raid - in the fear that it would give evidence against him to the police.

David Carlile feared that Monty, a talking African Grey parrot, would depart from the usual saucy sayings adopted by his species and reveal his identity to investigating forces.

Not simply content to make off with a selection of antiques, jewellery and cash from the country home in Eastbury, Carlile stuck a surprised Monty into his swag bag - and promptly sold him on, leaving him yet to be reunited with his owner, Diana Winter.

According to the Sun, Carlile told police officers: "Parrots can talk and I didn't want it grassing me up."

A police source is reported as saying: "We were in stitches. This guy really thought we could interview the parrot.

"It's just as well we nicked him through fingerprints and DNA - I wouldn't have liked to have introduced the parrot to a judge as our chief prosecution witness."

Carlile, perpetrator of over 100 burglaries in the region, needn't have worried about the impact that a talking bird would have on his livelihood - he was promptly sent down for seven years upon being apprehended.

Whoever it is who eventually got their claws on Monty will have to take note of his predilection for white grapes - the only food that he deigns to eat.